From Fiction to Fact!

(originally posted on August 20, 2012)

Hmm,I am not sure how to start. They say arabs don’t read,and they are definitely right about that 🙂 ,but I used to learn a lot from like minded people posts and experiences,and I would like to do the same for others,may be somebody will benefit from my own humble experience.

I have always dreamed about being into a real Femdom oriented relationship,and taking into consideration that I started having such emotions and desires at a very early age ( around 9 or 10 ),you will see it is decades by now !I have always dreamed about it,but never thought it would come true,never thought I will end up with such a lovely dominant Lady,so when it happened I thought that was the happy ending of my long tiring journey.

Of course it is happy,but a happy beggining,not an ending :).

Fantasy land is completely different,and I guess it wont surprise you to know that things in real life tend to be more complicated and multi-dimensional.

In a fantasy,you can find the sexiest woman in fancy fetish clothes of your own choice ! She will beat you to your heart contents  and you will have the greatest pain tolerance ever! She will be the perfect Goddess,the strong ,dominant ,smart and sexy Goddess that happens to care about nothing but fullfilling your desires !! 🙂 )

She will treat you like shit,and you will adore her for it!

Yes,I know about it,because I have been there once,but unfortunately things are much more complicated in real life,and against the popular belief,it is much more difficult to create a fullfilling and powerful Femdom oriented relationship in real than it is in fantasy and virtual land,it needs time,effort and dedication.

I have been thinking about this over and over again and I can’t say I have reached a solid conclusion regarding this,why is it more complicated in real??But I just have some thoughts and feelings to share.

Hmmm,my fellow submissive guys will probably understand this part,that wild scene when your domme puts you exactly in your place as her slave,using many tools including her powerful eyes,her whip may be,different sorts of humiliating acts,and you get pushed in that lovely sub space,you know about it,I am sure,but what you don’t know is,it is a bit different in real,not because it is real,it is because of the most weird reason ever,it is complicated because that lovely domina of your dreams is your pratener,your lover! and believe me you wont feel k when your lover treat you as a lowly slave and an object! Now calm down,there is a lot of fun in it,and a lot of amazing scenes,but I am talking about the dynamics,the day to day dynamics.If you are a slave at heart,then you understand that what a slave needs goes beyond a scene,and a mere kinky sexual act! you need to be enslaved,owned,and here comes the first trouble.You love that woman,You feel romantic towards her,and sometimes it sounds like being romantic takes down the spicy Femdom part,and vice versa.It is a challenge, you need to be owned and enslaved to be satisfied,but you still need a very intimate relationship with your domme,who is your partener and your wife! you need that intimacy and closeness.I understand some may think I am saying nonsense,and that it just seems I am unexperienced,but that is not true,may be I am just unable to bring up my point clearly,bu there is definitely a challenge in there!

I believe the best strategy is the” be yourself strategy”and the “be spontaneous” strategy,and applying it to my intimate life,I found some contradictory impulses,I just followed every impulse spontaneously,and that is what happened.Coming back from work,passing by a lovely flower shop,a beautiful rose you see,you rush inside buying a lovely bouquet for your lovely woman and gets back as quickly as possible to home, giving her the flowers and kissing her cheecks!A romantic dinner,may be a walk,and some nice discussions,political,family issues,or whatever comes,then you sleep happily.

Another day,you feel so excited,you start to sense the slave inside you moaning wildly craving his mistress,and you start expressing it,you find a way to show it,cleaning the house before your mistress wake up,waking her up with some massage,trying to be nice and submissive,and of course a loving partener will see the submissive look in your eyes,and will act accordingly ( keep in mind that I am describing it from a male sub perspective,sometimes the female dominant take the initiative,and things are a bit different,but i am trying to grasp some concept here),so anyway, she starts enjoying her submissive,and things go on that way,it may be wild,or smooth according to your mistress mood,and that day ends happily.So where is the problem? Actually the problem appears later,when you start feeling it was just a scene,even if it took a whole day,it was just a scene,a sort of roleplay! you feel she is your partener,not your mistress,your partener with whom you play some spicy games at times,and this makes you feel a bit frustrated! (btw,the mistress feels the same!)…Parteners in a healthy relationship who care about each other will not repress it,they will discuss it,as what is more important than thier intimate relationship and mutual satisfaction,and you both may start considering taking this part more seriously,try a more intense,more official mistress/slave experience,and you start doing it,but it doesnt work perfectly,for many reasons not related to both of you,reasons like coming back late from work, family issues you both need to take care of that leave you with a very little time,but that is fine,life is hard ! you try again,and you both will feel so excited at first,but then something will happen,you will get back home with a bad temper because of x son of a bitch at work,and you will need the soft shoulder of your lover,not the firm hand of your mistress,sometimes she will just collapse for any reason,and throw herself in your arms,as you wrap your strong arms around her,so what,it is ok,she is a woman dude ! she needs your strong arms ,and a male sub is a human who needs a soft shoulder to rest on,this is very normal and I understand this,but it takes down the Femdom dynamics ! You need to be both romantic and Femdom oriented and it is not an easy task,take my word on this !

 

I am not sure if this is a general problem,but I do believe that our eastern culture makes things harder for Femdom oriented couples,not only because of the social refusal of this sort of relationships,actually it is because of our own reflexes and emotional make up ! The society is inside us ! I learnt that it is always easy to manipulate your thoughts,ideas,you may believe in things,be more mentally liberal,but the real test is when you start putting your beliefs into action.Here,you will get surprised with your emotional make up and involuntary reflexes.Our minds are preoccupied with a certain romantic picture about male dominated relationships,it sounds like the most romantic to us,though it is not what we need,want,or believe in ( as folks in Femdom society)..Very long ago,before I met my muse (I am sure You know by now You are my muse honey,the loveliest woman I ever laid eyes upon 😉 ),before I met my muse,I thought I might have a vanilla relationship with a girl I love ,and keep a strictly Femdom oriented relationship with a second woman,but that was not possible,and I distasted the idea later,as it is very humiliating to that second woman,it is like she is a sexual object,how can you transform your mistress into a sexual object ? It is mean,and beside being mean,it is gonna destroy the whole ownership experience.And for your lover,how can you not share the most intimate and vulnerable part of your being with her,it is like keeping her outside the house,when she is the one who deserves to enter the most! I came to a conclusion,that my lover,my mistress,my wife are all ONE ! but when you come to real practise,you find your eastern nature acting as a barrier,you show her the slave inside,the slave who belongs to her, but you sometimes feel uncomfortable,uncomfortable to believe that being submissive can be as romantic as the traditional male led romance.I think it is something wrong inside our eastern minds! something stupid,but realising how stupid it is won’t take it off! It needs some effort, and the domme’s role in here is crucial..It may sound just like a common sense,but the slave still needs to listen to it,to know that his mistress,his partner understands that he will grow flowers to her in her backyard,will work hard to provide her with everything she needs,will long for his kids,kids he sees in her eyes! will protect her and will even burn the world for her if necessary!He will do all of these things but still wants to feel he is her docile subservient and owned slave ! It relaxes the sub a lot,and removes tons of inhibitions when his partner lets him hear this.

I am not sure how to deal with this issue yet,but I am sure about one thing! I am the luckiest man ever to have met the love of my life,and the queen of my heart,the one I want to grow old with and enjoy every little treat in this tough life with.

I am not sure if what I have discussed would be beneficial for anyone,but at least I tried to share a bit about my own experience with you folks.

Hmm,another reason for writing this,is to tell You honey how much I appreciate everything You do for me,Your patience when You are faced by my inhibitions,Your compassion when I feel bad,Your care and Your heavenly Royal touch 🙂 …I am so lucky to have You as my lover,wife,and definitely as my Mistress 🙂 ..And finally as my sweet mistress always say,it just needs time,and we will find what is right for us,we will come to find our special formula..I believe we will Mistress 🙂

Her Wild Stallion

4 Responses to “From Fiction to Fact!”

  1. معظم العرب لا يقرأ لكنني اري ان هذا يناسبني جدا حيث انني لا اريد اغلب العرب ان يقرأوا ما اكتب، فأغلبهم لن يدرك او يستوعب ما اكتبه ولن يفعلوا غير تسطيح اﻷفكار و التعامل معها بما يتناسب مع تصورهم عن نوعية كاتب ما اكتب.

    فعلا من المؤسف ان اجد نفسي افكر بلغة غير لغة اﻷصليه التي اعشق، اشعر كأنني سرق مني جزأ من هويتي.

    علي اية حال شكرا لإتحاة الفرصة لي للكتابة بالعربية.

  2. يا صديقى, كلنا هذا الرجل! أنا مثلك حزنت كثيرا يوم قررت ان اعبر عن نفسى بغير لغتى الام, كما لو انهم انتزعونى من احضان امى و القوا بى بين يدى امرأة غريبة عنى! حقا و ليس تعصبا, كم هى ثرية العربية, و كانما اخترعها فنان, و كانما خلقت لتكتب شعرا و نثرا ترتعش له القلوب, و تبدو جوارها اى لغة اخرى باهتة و هزيلة, و لكنه القدر ان نتركها..
    لكن هناك امرا اخر دعانى للكتابة بالانجليزية, و هو رغبتى ان احلق فوق جدران المكان, لتكن كلماتى متاحة لكل البشر, باختلاف لغاتهم و لونهم و اوطانهم..فكم ستكون محظوظا لو سكنت كلماتك عقل رجل, او دمعت لها عينى امراة فى ابعد بقاع الارض عنك, و كان لافكارك اجنحة تحلق بها فوق الصحارى و البحار لتسكن عقول و قلوب البشر فى كل مكان.
    فكل نساء العالم امهاتى, و كل جميلات الكون حبيباتى, و كل بلاد الارض اوطانى :).. و مع ذلك يبقى ذاك الحنين الحالم لحضن امك الاكثر دفئا من الشمس ذاتها!

    • أستطيع أن أرى تأثير نزار على لغتك، اللغه العربيه صنعت لنقل المشاعر بينما تنقل الانجليزيه الحقائق. للأسف نحن أسرى ثقافه هذه الايام

  3. بالتاكيد
    ليس فقط لغتى التى تاثرت بنزار, فاشعار نزار قبانى قد ساهمت فى تكوين افكارى و وجدانى

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